Fertility Stories: 18 Months of Trust & Surrender | Tam Oblowitz #120

Ever wondered how fertility journeys intertwine with the power of trust and surrender? 

On this episode Dylan brings you an enriching conversation with his patient Tam Oblowitz. 
Tam's incredible journey towards fertility is sure to inspire, as she bares her heart out about the emotional rollercoaster she experienced during her long journey towards fertility before finding Ayurveda and how things shifted for her once that happened. Her experiences reveal the importance of shifting one's mindset and taking control of one's health.

Tam's story is a testament to the transformative power of this ancient holistic science. Dylan and Tam also delve into the different treatments and herbs that helped support Tam in her fertility journey. This traditional approach, aimed at nourishing the womb and reproductive tissues, resonates deeply with Tam's ethos of holistic healing.

In this engaging conversation, Dylan & Tam explore the concept of trusting your body and surrendering to the fertility journey. Tam shares her insights on how tuning into her body's responses and maintaining faith in the process has been vital in her journey to conceive her cheerful and  6-week-old baby. They also discuss how these principles can impact the processes of conception and birthing, adding a new dimension to our understanding of fertility. 

Tune in to our enlightening discussion to discover more about Ayurvedic practices, preconception stories, and the incredible power of trust and surrender.

IN THIS EPISODE WE DISCUSS:
🧑‍🍼 Tam's Journey of Trust and Surrender​
🧑‍🍼 The Role of Spirituality In Tam's Fertility Journey​
🧑‍🍼 Ayurveda and Holistic Well-being Focused On Preconception & Fertility​
🧑‍🍼 Divine Timing: Learning To Flow With Nature's Rythms​
🧑‍🍼 Hope and Wisdom For Those Grappling With Fertility Issues​

ABOUT OUR GUEST: Tam Oblowitz

Tamarin holds a Masters in Clinical Psychology, and has trained at prestigious clinics in Beverly Hills, California.

Through her travels, attending Balinese healing + yoga retreats, and life experiences, Tam has merged her Psychotherapy experience and background with her spiritual guidance, intuitive and energetic healing capabilities. And so, EmpowHER Healing was born. Tam now calls Sydney, Australia, home.

Tam offers one-on-one sessions (in person and virtual) which which weave the wisdom of many modalities, merging the traditional psychotherapy model with a more holistic + spiritual guidance + healing. Her powerful sessions aim to cultivate the deep transformation driven by one’s readiness to discover their own potential for self-love, empowerment, expansion, and healing. Clients leave Tam’s sessions with their souls feeling aligned, empowered, expanded, and transformed.

After struggling to conceive for 12 months, Tam approached Dylan seeking for guidance and support in her pre-conception journey. After 6 months of undergoing an Ayurvedic preconception protocol prescribed by Dylan and adhering to subtle lifestyle changes, Tam managed to successfully conceive a healthy and thriving baby. 

Transcript

Dylan Smith: 0:00

Fertility stories from everyday people: 18 months of trust and surrender", with Tam Oblowitz. Welcome to the Vital Veda Show. I'm your host, Dylan Smith. I'm an Ayurvedic practitioner and holistic health educator who, in my clinic, which is based online and in person throughout Australia, the number one thing I see is fertility, whether it is people having fertility issues or people wanting to conceive with awareness and increase their health before they try to conceive. And one of those people is today one of my patients, Tam Oblowitz, who has joined me to share her journey.

Dylan Smith: 0:42

And this is a new addition to the Vital Veda Podcast, where we will be intertwining within the podcast stories from various people from all walks of life, not necessarily my patients, but a variety of people. So I hope you enjoy this episode. I hope you get something out of it, whether you are wanting to conceive soon or in the future, and if any questions or any comments on this, please let us know in Instagram or email us. And enjoy! Tam, welcome to the podcast. Good to see you in this setting. I'm used to seeing you in the clinical setting or in various visits to collect hers or something, so I'm glad we can shine the energy on you, and you can be the radiant one to share the knowledge this time.

Tam Oblowitz: 1:38

Thanks for having me.

Dylan Smith: 1:40

So we've started this new thing in the Vital Veda Podcast, where we're creating stories from people from all walks of life and, threaded within the Vital Veda Podcast episodes, we're creating stories, preconception stories. So you were on my mind when I thought of this little project. So I'd like to begin with the question that I ask every time: what did you do this morning? What's your daily routine?

Tam Oblowitz: 2:09

Oh, this morning's like the worst date pick, because I didn't - I didn't - I haven't meditated yet, believe it or not, I haven't done self-abhyanga, but I did abhyanga on bub and that for me, actually, funnily enough, is meditative and I feel like, as strange as it sounds, I feel like I'm doing abhyanga on myself in some ways, even though I'm performing it on her. So what did I do? Well, yeah, it is we're still one, and so I shouldn't say I've done nothing, because I've done a lot in terms of providing for her.

Dylan Smith: 2:46

What's her age now?

Tam Oblowitz: 2:48

She is nine weeks today. Yeah, time's flown. But we woke up and she sleeps next to me, which is beautiful. She wakes up every morning, massive smile plastered across her face, just really happy. I kind of interact with her a bit and just giggling and laughing and just really being present in her energy. And then my husband delivered breakfast in bed, which is now a normal thing, so get used to that and delivering the breakfast in bed. But and then what did I do? Honestly, it's a bit of a blur. I think I sat in the sun for a little bit, just got some vitamin D.

Dylan Smith: 3:36

And the baby as well?

Tam Oblowitz: 3:38

After. I did it separately. So after I massaged her I let the oil set in in the sun a bit, so she was in the sun for a little bit, and then I showered her or bathed her, and then I gave her to my husband for a little bit, and then I went to sit in the sun alone just for like 10, 15 minutes. And then, yeah, I went to cranial sacral therapy session, both of us so doing some chiro work. And then now we're here, I don't know the day's just flown.

Tam Oblowitz: 4:06

That was the day.

Dylan Smith: 4:07

So since we did their workshop on Baby Abhyanga - you watched the workshop, right?

Tam Oblowitz: 4:11

Yeah, but to be honest, I'm only halfway through because I keep going back and making sure. So I'm almost like watching it over and over again and I haven't finished it yet.

Dylan Smith: 4:22

So we did this workshop on Baby Abhyanga, which is oil massage for babies, an important tool to increase the immunity and build the tissues and enhance this protective layer, like this layer, the shield of armor, and we recently did a workshop on it with my teacher, Dr Nayani Raju, and it really, for me, even it was like wow, this is a bigger thing than I thought in terms of importance and in terms of time and in terms of energy towards it. So has that shifted?

Tam Oblowitz: 4:51

Yeah, I must say it's so interesting doing massage on her versus doing massage on me. It's the energy is just so different. I don't know, maybe it's like because it's it's like two in one, like I said, like while I'm massaging her I'm feeling the energy for me, whereas when you're just doing self-abhyanga, it's just self-focused, right?, But then I'm just seeing the impact on her. I've been doing massage on her for like a couple of weeks, but I've been doing it, you know, Padma's way for only a couple of days and it's just so intricate, right? Like just the way in which you go along the kidneys and the, the ribs, you know, for the respiratory on the back, I've been noticing and you know we're in kind of spring season now and like allergies are rampant, you know and just been noticing just subtle like energy shifts while I'm doing it with her, for her I suppose. But it's, yeah, like you said, it's like very layered.

Dylan Smith: 5:56

Yes, can you realize the difference in her since doing the more elaborate Abhyanga?

Tam Oblowitz: 6:00

Mm-hmm, she's definitely. She's always been an alert baby, like everyone comments on how alert she is. But I just I know she seems kind of more smiley, yeah, like even though her smiles have only started, you know, the past two weeks, she's just like extra smiley now, yeah, yeah.

Dylan Smith: 6:19

Okay, so I want to also paint a picture about yourself. Yes, if you can introduce yourself, and the point as well is just to. With these interviews, it's people from all walks of life that are going on the journey of preconception and fertility.

Tam Oblowitz: 6:34

Mm-hmm. So, in terms of introducing myself, I'm obviously I'm Tam, well Tamarin, but everyone calls me Tam and I am a trained clinical psychotherapist. But I've kind of I've really fused that work with a more holistic framework. So I would say I'm more spiritual psychologist and I really infuse intuitive energy work and healing into my practice and I mainly work with the divine feminine. So, woman, really that's on a bit of a hiatus at the moment I'm on maternity leave.

Tam Oblowitz: 7:14

And then, just in terms of my preconception journey, I think I came to you in March of last year yeah, I'm pretty sure it was March of last year and my husband and I had been trying on- and- off for about 12/ 13 months, had taken a few breaks along the way, and I was just, I think, really naive, like I'd seen a bunch of naturopaths before. I was living a pretty healthy lifestyle, you know, taking all the supplements, and so I was really shocked when it didn't happen as soon as I wanted it to. Now, with preconception, there's obviously a big physiological, physical component, but there's also a higher power at play that we have zero control over and there's that spiritual element, right. But I think what redrew me to Ayurveda and I say redrew me is that my mother and I, a while ago, went, we were on an Ayurveda retreat in Bali and I just remember feeling like my absolute best of my entire life and so there was one day during like my, you know, preconception journey where I was just feeling so low about it all and I was thinking back like to a point in my life where things maybe were challenging, but I was able to take myself out of that low point and really like have a huge shift. And so I remembered you know, that Bali Ayurveda retreat.

Tam Oblowitz: 8:42

So I don't know who told me about you, but someone did, and I think I booked my first appointment in March, and I didn't book it for preconception, I think I just booked Abhyanga. And then the didgeridoo, you played over my womb as well. I booked that as an appointment and then I think at the end I only told you that I was trying to conceive and then you kind of gave me almost like this framework of you know, these are the treatments that I recommend you doing, these are the herbs I recommend you taking, and at first it was like a bit overwhelming, like wow, this is a lot. But I really, really I've got the personality of like "I'm going to commit and I'm going to be so loyal to this because I want a baby. And not only do I want a baby, I want a baby to be born from the healthiest you know constitution as possible. And so I think I was coming like a few times a week at one point for treatments. We're doing metrobasty, was that right?

Dylan Smith: 9:44

Yeah, we're doing different therapies, even maybe seven consecutive days.

Tam Oblowitz: 9:49

Yes.

Dylan Smith: 9:50

Every few months, and so, before we get into the details of what we did I just want to go back. You're saying you were trying for about 12 months. Is that what you were doing?

Tam Oblowitz: 10:01

Yeah, actually around about 12. Yeah, about on- and- off, so I wouldn't say 12 consecutive months, but we'd probably we'd started trying 12 months prior to when I came to see you.

Dylan Smith: 10:10

Yeah, and what was your - You said you were expecting to conceive at the time. What was your age at the time?

Tam Oblowitz: 10:19

36.

Dylan Smith: 10:22

And what was going through? What emotions were going through you when you weren't conceiving succesfully?

Tam Oblowitz: 10:31

Total shock. I was like " I'm I think conceiving Westerners they say like, " you're a geriatric, which I think it's ridiculous. It's like, no, I'm really not and you share of, like you know people, women in their mid-40s conceiving very easily and successfully. So Even like I didn't refer to my journey as an infertility journey, I referred to it as a fertility journey and I think in in Western world, that's very important.

Dylan Smith: 10:58

I Really important. mean words, you know, even I used to used the word "infertility my infertility patients, fertility problems, because infertility actually means impotency.

Tam Oblowitz: 11:10

Yeah, like you cannot, like you've got no ovaries, or like your uterus, yeah, exactly yeah.

Dylan Smith: 11:17

Yeah, totally.

Tam Oblowitz: 11:18

Yeah, so I really very quickly started referring to it as my fertility journey. But yeah, so I started. I was just shocked.

Tam Oblowitz: 11:28

I was just like I've wanted a baby for so long, I thought that this is gonna happen easily, given you know that I lead such a healthy lifestyle. So it's just shock. And then that shock kind of morphed into like deep, you know, disappointment and like almost like a feeling of like destitute, like it sounds dramatic but like a helplessness, like well, when's this baby going to come? And I wouldreally roscillate oscillate obetween r trusting t trusting like trusting high power, the universe and then going to like complete fear, and I think that's so women - - for women is to fluctuate between the two.

Dylan Smith: 12:09

It's a lot, that it might not happen, yeah.

Tam Oblowitz: 12:12

Yeah, toward the end I started to feel like, no, it is going to happen, it's just a matter of when, you know. But that deep fear at the beginning, especially when I was, it seemed like I was trying everything like with all, like the naturopaths and the acupuncture you know, hopping from acupuncturist, acupuncturist and just it's like, well, nothing's changing, nothing's happening. Now I want to add that I had an extra element, like an extra layer, which was that my cycles were irregular, but I didn't have endometriosis. I had no underlying issues except my cycle was irregular, and I found that really frustrating.

Dylan Smith: 12:52

Yeah, so it makes it adds in a another challenge. Yeah, trying to line up rhythms of ovulation yeah, yeah, yeah. So when you started seeing us in the clinic, how long then were you till you conceived?

Tam Oblowitz: 13:06

It was six months, Okay which is funny, I think you actually told me you said, oh, it's gonna be like a couple months. I think you said "I don't want to promise anything, but like I remember that early on you said, ah, if you just if you do the herbs, you do the treatments, you kind of change your lifestyle in these certain ways, will take like six months or something.

Dylan Smith: 13:25

Okay, and even after, because obviously you were trying throughout the six months. Then, when you and and there were times where, like what I do with many patients, if you wanting to try, although me wanting not- wanting you to try, but I get it.

Dylan Smith: 13:40

You know it's the biggest thing with people who are on the journey and they want to try it every ovulation yeah, or more often than I advise, for reasons of basically, to pull back the bow and preserve the Ojas or preserve the reproductive essence yes, a bit more, so that later it's the target is easier to hit.

Dylan Smith: 13:58

So when, even throughout the six months when you weren't I mean you were all in on this area better and and I do tend to give a lot for fertility because it's the number one passion of ours it's the really the one single time in someone's life when they should be giving all the energy and attention towards their health, because it's to optimise the seed before they plant it, for that future human.

Dylan Smith: 14:22

So we tend to give a lot and we, especially I, give a lot when someone, like, has been trying for a year and they are entering their late 30s. So we need we definitely need more nourishment and more interventions. So when you - when you're with me, you were all in, you were so, so beautiful, like such a good, because you surrendered and you adhered like over. Ayurveda It has a very clear definition Definition of a successful patient and one of the factors is surrender, and one of them is you actually obey, so you're doing the things, but then even after a few months, you know, for five months it still wasn't happening. So how did you feel when you were on the the Ayurvedic plan

Tam Oblowitz: 15:02

p, you still planand and and a, conceiving,. Frustrated?? conceiving frustrated at times, but I felt like I was ascending spiritually. So not in that realm of like, I don't know, I like to 3D it the 3d realm, not that realm of like. You know, this isn't happening. What's happening like grasping on as much as I was before, and meditation obviously helped drastically with that. But I think what also helped is, as you say, surrender.

Tam Oblowitz: 15:29

So I remember being very anxious when you said to me don't try for a couple months. I was like what do you mean? So I'm losing out time? And I laughed when just before, when you said that, because in retrospect that was so important and I advise a lot of my clients on the fertility journey to do the same thing thing, like ike just give yourself, your mind, a break, if not your body or both, you know. And so, yeah, there were moments of frustration, but I would say that the trust trumped the frustration. The trust did, and I just was like I said I shifted, I was like, oh, it's not happening, but it's a matter of when, not if, yeah.

Dylan Smith: 16:09

Yeah, because obviously throughout the whole time, even from the beginning, you had that contrast of trust and surrender and also is this.

Tam Oblowitz: 16:19

Yeah, well, that's a human response, right?.?

Dylan Smith: 16:22

Yeah, that's really great that it evolved over the 18 months. Yeah, good, and how was your partner throughout this?

Tam Oblowitz: 16:31

So he was like what are all these things you're taking? No, no, but he's very respectful and he accepts that I am. And there were times where I was like, well as the man, like your sperm's also important, you should be doing this and that. And then you know, he was like, well, "you know, I do my own things and I do it my own way. And I was like, fine, you know, you do it your own way. He was like the countertop is getting a little too clad with all the herbs. But you know he was. He was a rock for me in the sense that he's just very level-headed. So he kept reminding me, like, don't go too hard on yourself. I was like, but I'm doing all these things. He's like, yeah, and you can continue to do them, but mindset is really important and just know you're doing everything Possible and this is going to happen, it's just a matter of time. So he, he was amazing in that sense and that's probably what I really needed?

Dylan Smith: 17:32

Yeah, it was. Did he get frustrated or? Never, he was never like oh, come on, stop doing this thing. You've been seeing this guy for six months.

Tam Oblowitz: 17:42

I don't think he hever said that. I think at the beginning, when I was doing enemas enemies, he was woe like, this is what are you doing? So, dylan, if you want to explain maybe that process of, life

Dylan Smith: 17:55

We call it Matra Basti and it's one of the deeper interventions for fertility because it's a nourishing enema. It's not a detox enema and it's usually a medicated oil or a medicated ghee which is absorbed into the body and withheld overnight and it directly nourishes and penetrates the womb area and the lower abdomen in that you, that whole nerve plexus which ends in the umbilical cord, which everything starts from.

Tam Oblowitz: 18:22

So I actually miss them. I know, I know, I know yeah.

Dylan Smith: 18:27

So that's, that's really good, and because I think it's a common thing where the women is doing all the work and couples sometimes the woman's only on board, especially in this industry in the Ayurveda, in the yoga industry and the natural health the men kind of don't really want to do so much. So that's- It's good for people to hear how, how man can be that beautiful rock and even not be so interested in it, but still being respectful and stable, Um well, any of the protocols are strain or anything. Did anything ever become a strain?

Tam Oblowitz: 19:02

No, no, I think initially, when you told me, like what to do, like what to do and, um, you know all the herbs to take, that felt like just a little overwhelming, but never a strain. And I think at the beginning, with the matrabastis busties or the, the enemas, I found it obviously like maybe the first two, three days to to hold it in because you're meant to only, you know, go to the um, release um next morning. So I think you know I waited a few hours the first few nights and I had to go, and then your body just adapts and it really gets used to what it's meant to get used to which to, totally fine to keep an enema, the matribusty, for matrabasti one to two hours.

Dylan Smith: 19:45

. So the more you practice it, the more you do it. It's like people do abyungary vetic Abhyanga, bhyanga Ayurvedic. This is like oilyating the oileating oileating organs and womb. So, closer to the time when, closer to the time of success, the time you tried, I mean, was it very? I s even remember because with my journey it was well, we were different. We, we tried two months. The first month we were not successful for reasons that I know. In the second month we were, but you know we kind of knew this was the month it was for. This month was that with you, as in the month that you tried you kind of it led up to that, or it was just another month of trying?

Tam Oblowitz: 20:29

No, we knew, we knew and I. You were actually on a call with me and Harsha Raju and he said you're ovulating. Now it's go time because, just as I said previously, my cycles were all over the place. I did go to a fertility clinic and have cycle management for one for a couple weeks before I conceived and Harsha told me I was ovulating before blood tests confirmed through the fertility clinic that I was. So I went based off of his guidance, and then later they called me and they said hey, your blood tests show that you're, that you're ovulating. And I was like, yeah, no, I'm like, how do you know?

Dylan Smith: 21:18

Tthat is through video recognition and That you by the Harsha yes yeah, yeah by. Harsha,. self.

Tam Oblowitz: 21:26

So he was reading my pulse, which is phenomenal, so fascinating, and he was able to say you're ovulating, now is a great time for you to conceive. But I also just had that in a knowing and my husband also knew he knew. So when I showed him the test of the positive pregnancy test, he was like, see, I told you I told you it's this month. I told you what happened. Yeah, I think if you're deeply connected to yourself and your partner and you are, you know, spiritually connected you do know.

Dylan Smith: 22:06

You just know when it's happening yeah, what advice would you give for people to have? Because I think everyone, as we said, everyone faces that balance of trust and fear and when the fear comes, it's again, You you need that surrender to succeed and follow through. And when 18 months, two, three, four years, people go on. So how advice would you yougive g give to t who is struggling?

Tam Oblowitz: 22:34

Just to not lose hope, as cliche as it sounds, and that your body, like I, kept having this mantra that like I was born to be fertile, I was born to procreate. There's no way I cannot, it's just a matter of time. Like there's no way. And what's confusing is medicine- Western medicine will have you believing the opposite. So I did go the intervention route, like at one point I had ovulation induction the one month I remember telling you my body reacted so shockingly to that, to the hormones. My body kne w. My body was like Tam, this isn't for you, and you know that works for a lot of people, as does IVF. And I'm not bashing either thing like there's- We all have soul contracts and ways to get to what we we need and desire. But I think just, you know, just really reinforcing that trust, that trust in a higher power in your body, that your body can do this, you know, and it's the same way I birthed, I did a home birth and I had the same mentality like I was born to do this. I can home birth, I can have zero drugs, zero intervention, I can do it, you know. But having both those mentalities it worked for me and I think I mentioned to you.

Tam Oblowitz: 23:50

People say to me oh, you're so lucky, you had a home birth. Oh you're so lucky you are able to conceive after a year and it wasn't like five years. Oh you're so lucky, your baby's temperament is like pretty easy and you've had like a great recovery postpartum. And I smile. I don't say this to them but I guess if they're listening they'll now hear it's not luck, it's really not luck. I worked really hard at each stage. To conceive. I worked hard to have the birth I wanted and I've worked really hard to have the postpartum recovery and the spirit of the child that I wanted. You know, it's all work, it's all inner work. So you know, in summary, it's like, have that trust, but if that fear comes up, don't, you know, resist it, explore it. What's the fear about? What's what's this about? For me it was control or not having control, and I think that that's very common, you know, is surrendering that control.

Dylan Smith: 24:44

Yeah, I loved how you said I know what's going to happen, it's just a matter of time yeah, yeah. So trust, trusting your body, the word for time in the Vedas is "Kala, which is related with kali. It's that feminine time is a very feminine thing and it's it's not masculine. Masculine timing is control. Okay, I'm gonna do I this intervention for three months and then I'm gonna try and then see. But but the feminine aspect of time which is, of course, is birthing from feminine into a human.

Tam Oblowitz: 25:14

It's fluid, is fluid and it's so dynamic. Another piece of advice I'd give is like you know, as much as you want it to happen and you've been trying, when something's not happening it is a sign to just pause and stop trying, stop forcing. And you know we actually, when I say we stopped trying like we didn't do anything when I thought that I might be ovulating or fertile, like we literally held back. It's not like people say, oh, we stop trying but they still have intercourse and they're like, oh, if it happens, it happens. Like literally stopped trying. And for me that helped me be like, okay, well, this month it's not happening because I'm making it not happen. You know, I'm really giving my body and my spirit and my mind and my just emotional sense of well-being.

Dylan Smith: 26:04

I'm giving it all a break yes, and particularly the body, the reproductive essence. You know when you hold orgasm or ejaculation for a month. That's why we prefer up to three months or less possible. Yeah, that literally preserves and builds that reproductive essence before again hitting the target later which is why it's also so important.

Tam Oblowitz: 26:28

You know, like with miscarriages, right? People will have a miscarriage and they're like, oh yeah, we're just gonna try next month again. And I think I don't say this, but I think to myself oh no, your body needs a couple months break, like that was a death like you did conceive and you need to absolutely hit the brakes.

Dylan Smith: 26:47

Yeah, that's so much more now with miscarriages and people need to rejuvenate like they would postpartum. A and fully remove that memory of the miscarriage before trying again. And they need to really do the same. It's essentially the same grieve and physically use the same interventions as postpartum to rejuvenate. So definitely. What parts of the preconception journey and interventions did you enjoy? You mentioned matra basti.

Tam Oblowitz: 27:16

Yeah, I did love that. I loved- What was the seven chakra?

Dylan Smith: 27:24

We did chakra basti.

Tam Oblowitz: 27:25

Chakra basti. Loved that. Had some spiritual, you know, visions while that was happening.

Dylan Smith: 27:32

So that's a treatment of if you imagine making a doughnut or a big doughnut, a doughnut with a big hole around the belly button, and then we fill that with a medicated oil and for you a fertility ghee, and we put that in the womb on the belly and that penetrates into the enteric nervous system, all our nerve plexuses in the human biology and in the umbilicus area, the belly button. And this treatment is holding. basti" means to hold. This is an external busty. It means to hold a medicated oil over the navel. So when that more medicated oil is sitting like a pool over the belly, held by dough to seal it, then the herbs and the medicine penetrates into the womb and nourishes it. We give very specialized over the curbs and gays, which also people resend to patients around the world, if they're not in Australia, in our clinic areas and they can use them with their local practitioner and allow that oil to penetrate. And we'll do that over seven days and it has this effect of nourishing, it has this a deep effect of calming and it's not only for fertility, it's for immune health, it's for digestive health and it's for centering, because everything starts the umbilicus, that's where life starts from. So it's really such a powerful way and if they other than much robustly.

Dylan Smith: 29:06

W e do a lot of home therapies for fertility, getting like yourself, Tam, to do things yourself. So the medicated oils applying into the belly button and then feeling that penetrate because these special oils definitely work, like the Marma oil and the Nabhi oil, different medicated oils, even the fertility ghee especially, or the fertility nasiqa, those oils, even just a few drops or 10 drops in the belly button has, because oil has that ability of Sukshma", which means subtle, so it can penetrate through the subtle channels deep into the body and directly into the womb and not only build and nourish the womb and build the reproductive tissue but correct any distortion of intelligence, any intelligence that's distorted, for example after a miscarriage. We need to remove that memory of letting the fetus go. We need to remind the body how to hold on to the embryo and allow it to grow into the fetus. So different things like that, different applications to the navel.

Dylan Smith: 30:13

The matrabasti also is an internal basti, as we mentioned earlier, and that's say around 30 milliliters of oil, 30 to 60 milliliters, inserted via the rectum through certain tubes and syringes, and that's done by the patient themselves before sleep and that's inserted into the rectum, which directly again nourishes that area in a different way from internal. External is not less. It's very, also profound, that transdermal technology of entering the body transdermally, through the skin, because the skin has so many nerve endings, and then the much matra basti is the internal basti. Basti means to hold, so holding oil, whether you're holding it in the inside or you're holding it on the outside, on the navel, via this chakra basti treatment, also called nabhi basti. So you can check out the show notes to have a photo of what it looks like.

Tam Oblowitz: 31:13

There was so much more love and that's why they say making love or like made from love. You know, and I was reading the book Souls of Magnificence" and she writes the book Sacred Burthing as well, which is both. I highly recommend reading both of them by Sunny Carl I think it's the author for both of them and it just, it just says, you know, the love, like to like a child born from love is just what is what is?

Tam Oblowitz: 31:43

needed, and I feel like that I don't remember the other times, to be honest, I only remember the time that she was conceived, because that was such a powerful love you know, so probably evolved slowly that maybe I wasn't recognising it up until I did. Does that make sense?

Dylan Smith: 32:01

Beautiful. Yeah, and that time that you conceived, that month was it? Did you try multiple days or nights, or was it just once?

Tam Oblowitz: 32:11

I think it was just once.

Dylan Smith: 32:13

Okay, well-

Tam Oblowitz: 32:20

I think yeah, yeah.

Dylan Smith: 32:21

Because for some people it can be hard to recognise if they're trying six times a month or five or four times.

Tam Oblowitz: 32:26

Yeah, no, I know when she was conceived. Yeah, like I like, I know, like that moment.

Dylan Smith: 32:31

Yeah, yeah. And postpartum, how has that been?

Tam Oblowitz: 32:38

Wild but in an amazing, magical way. You know it's like nothing anyone can prepare you for. Parenthood and you know fatherhood, motherhood, it's such a blessing, especially after you've wanted it for a while. But postpartum I just feel emotionally I'm so grounded and strong and stable, and I really do credit that all the herbs, the Ayurvedic herbs that I've been taking, like the postpartum kit from you. And it's funny, I started like in the early days I would like crave the taste or crave the herb I wouldn't even need to remember to take it.

Tam Oblowitz: 33:24

I forget the name of it, but it's the postpartum rejuvenation the paste. Sutika Yog! What's in that?

Dylan Smith: 33:32

Many herbs.

Tam Oblowitz: 33:32

Yeah, but what, what? What balances you emotionally?

Dylan Smith: 33:36

It mainly works on the emotions.

Tam Oblowitz: 33:38

Yes, I felt that, I felt that very very deep.

Dylan Smith: 33:43

it actually removes negative energies from you and the child. What we call in Ayurveda grahas or bhutas, those negative energies which, because the baby's so vulnerable and open, so that protective layer.

Tam Oblowitz: 33:59

Yeah, and I felt that. I was like craving, craving it. So the herbs have been incredible support doing 40 days at home. I think some family members were like are you

Tam Oblowitz: 34:33

It was just based on what I was doing, but the first couple of nights, like after the birth, I could see and feel how Vata is so amplified, like I didn't properly sleep, that adrenaline is just rushing through your body and that is the Vata. The postpartum, in a nutshell, has been a beautiful journey. I mean, it's not all rainbows and butterflies. You know, obviously you've got the broken sleep.

Tam Oblowitz: 34:57

Obviously I'm not meditating twice a day for 20 minutes, but I feel like there are moments that are meditative for me and motherhood that become my meditation, Just like you know, massaging her for 15 minutes a day and sometimes twice a day, doing the baby A bhyanga, that's meditative for me. Or just actually being gentle as myself and being like, okay, I meditated for 10 minutes twice today, so I got one full meditation in instead of, you know, two 20 minutes each. Just being gentle and knowing that you know I've got a new role that is very important and I've got this little being relying on me completely. So just going with it.

Dylan Smith: 35:40

Your vata looks very pacified.

Tam Oblowitz: 35:44

is this Well,

Dylan Smith: 35:46

No but really, because in postpartum, some people can - it can last literally years, like I've seen, especially when that child is born in winter, which was the case for you.

Dylan Smith: 36:00

Yes, I remember we toured Australia in March with Dr Raju, my teacher, and a lot of the times he was saying still they were having issues because they did not take proper postpartum care. This is even 10 years later, even more than 10 years, 10, 20 years later. And especially he said is your baby born in winter? After feeling the pulse. And they said, yes. And they did not - because you have to take that extra care and you taking the postnatal tonic from day one, like a lot of people don't find out about those tonics until month, three or four or five or six, even two months later.

Dylan Smith: 36:36

The difference of you doing all that things day one, you can really balance that Vata straight away when it is roaring. And yeah, you've, just you've done so well. And it's very clear from looking at you and how everyone says, oh, she's so lucky, or everything's been like. We have the same thing on our journey. It's like Sole had not - like literally no issues in pregnancy, and they're like oh it's lucky. Like when I said to Dr Raju, Sole had nothing. He's like, of course!

Tam Oblowitz: 37:09

Exactly. Yeah, I remember seeing Hasha in March in person. I just wanted - I was pregnant. How many months would I have been?

Dylan Smith: 37:19

She probably must have been like 70.

Tam Oblowitz: 37:20

Yeah, I was like six,

Tam Oblowitz: 37:24

No, five months, I don't know, my maths all bad, anyway. So I came into the clinic and he, you know, checked my pulse and he was like. I was like looking at him, he's like, yeah, nothing.

Tam Oblowitz: 37:37

He's like no, everything's fine. I was like what do you mean everything is fine? He's like: no, you're doing all the things and everything feels great. He's like: eat what you want to eat. I was like "what? He was like no, like you know, obviously in moderation, but he's like you're being very good in in what you're eating and so you know if you feel like you know a piece of goat's cheese, he's like just just have it like just, you know, and I was kind of like really shocked in a good way, but he was, he was like everything's great.

Tam Oblowitz: 38:05

And then in the course, because I, as you know, did the fertility course and loved it, with the Raju's, and I remember them saying, like you know, it's best not to conceive at this time so that your baby's not born in winter. And I was just like, oh well, too late, rami's coming in winter, in July. But then I didn't realize that there are so many things you can do to balance that.

Dylan Smith: 38:32

So it actually doesn't, it's almost irrelevant you know, yeah, yeah, and that just on that. You know, there's different seasons which are easier to conceive or not. Only the strength is stronger, for example, conceiving during winter, we have more ojas, we have more vitality, we have more stamina. So it's a good time, but also it depends on the person, it depends on the body type and definitely there's so many, there's so many variables you can do to balance it so great.

Dylan Smith: 39:02

That's all. Just, nice stories. And thanks for sharing. Anything else you want to leave the audience with.

Tam Oblowitz: 39:10

I think I'm just going to run the point home of trust, like just have that trust that you can conceive a soul of magnificence and that you know. You know, Ayurveda is not just about supplements or herbs, like it's an entire lifestyle and it's just. It's for the mind, it's for the body, it's for the soul, the spirit it's and there's nothing else there.

Tam Oblowitz: 39:36

You know, out there like that, like you can get naturopathy or homeopathy and both are incredible in their own way, but they only really deal with the physical. You know there's nothing, there's no medicine out there aside from Ayurveda that deals with each layer of - you know, and I think it's the spirituality that draws me to Ayurveda, to be quite.

Dylan Smith: 39:58

Especially when you're trying for 18 months and you're at the wit's end. It really is the spirit which is the factor which keeps you in. Yeah, like if it wasn't for that trust and strength, which is that spiritual part of the journey, then you would be just loose. Or take me to the clinic, give me some embryo transfer, extract my eggs, ivf. So it's like when I see people who have been trying for over a year even less, it's really the spirit which needs to be strong. That's the thing.

Tam Oblowitz: 40:31

It really does. So I think that's the main thing is to anyone listening who's kind of feeling that you know, and I get it, that despondency, and some people turn around and say, gee, she's lucky, she only tried like a year because they've been trying a lot longer. And my heart does go out to those people because it's a journey and it's a real struggle. At times you do hit your darkest points, but I do believe that that's where you know, it's that saying, that's where the light enters through those cracks and those darkest moments. And you know, I wonder if I hadn't had issues conceiving or if it had happened a lot faster. Maybe I wouldn't be on this Ayurvedic journey that I'm on now. And so I'm so thankful. Like I look back and someone said to me like, oh, don't you wish you'd found, like Ayurveda, or refound it early? And I'm like, no, it all unfolded at the exact timing, the precise timing that it was meant to, because she wasn't meant to be, you know, born into this world earlier than when she came.

Dylan Smith: 41:32

Yeah, that's right so it's all divine timing. And the birth was followed. That you know. The birth may have been different if you conceived after two or three months.

Tam Oblowitz: 41:44

It's hard to say, but I do believe everything I've done has led me to exactly where I am, and it's a really beautiful place.

Dylan Smith: 41:52

Beautiful, thanks, Tam.

Tam Oblowitz: 41:53

Thank you.

Dylan Smith: 41:55

And if people want to learn about your work because you do this amazing intuitive stuff. Sole sometimes shows me on social media. She's like all these people asking you questions on Instagram and like your reply with an intuitive response is pretty fascinating. You were correct when we were trying to look to my house and move like up the other side of the state and you gave us some assistance, which was correct. I don't know if Sole told you.

Tam Oblowitz: 42:22

She did, she told me I gave you the exact house number and she said I told you, like where the months that you would be, yeah, yeah.

Dylan Smith: 42:30

Because we just quick on that. We found a house. I wanted to move there and buy it, but Sole didn't and she asked Tam and Tam's like not feeling it wait a bit this amount of months and that's when it came. Yeah, so, yeah, so you're on Instagram. You're on Instagram.

Tam Oblowitz: 42:45

Yes, so I'm on Instagram, also starting to think about other platforms to move to. But yeah, on Instagram, @empower her healing. So it's EMP or WHER healing, and yeah, you can find me there if you feel drawn to looking me up. I'm there, yeah, thank you.

Dylan Smith: 43:09

Thank you for listening. I hope you appreciated this episode and I hope you got something out of it from hearing other people's stories. We're going to continue to share more stories on the topic of preconception and other people's journeys. We have one coming up with my very good friend, Jess Ossie, where she shares her journey different to Tam's in the sense that she didn't have any fertility problems, but it was a real journey of surrendering to the physician and doing things not on the timeframe that her and her husband wanted to. But until then, subscribe to the Vital Veda podcast. If you want to book a consultation with me, you can go to vitalvada. com. au/ bookings and I mainly consult online, but also around Australia and different areas, even occasionally around the world. So until next time, much love.